Shawna R. B. Atteberry

I just wanted to let everyone know that I am still here. I am in the process of brainstorming and planning what I want to publish on the blog. It’s hard for me to come up with good, well-written posts off the seat of my pants (as my erratic posting shows). Hopefully, by next week I will be posting at least every other day, if not every day.

If you have any subjects you’d like to discuss or questions you want answered please let me know. Either leave a comment or email me. Mary, I have more to say on Rebekah, so I will continue our conversation as well (don’t give up on me!).

Bible study was excellent last night. All those years in religion classes and seminary, and the matriarchs were passed over. Never focused on—never part of the promise. But Disciple brings the matriarchs front and center: Sarah and Rebekah. God partners with them to realize his covenant promise. In God’s eyes they are not expendable as they are in the eyes of men—including their husbands. Abraham was not enough to begin the covenant people: Sarah was needed too. The son of promise had to come from both Abraham and Sarah. Abraham might think of Sarah as disposable (by giving her to two different kings), and Sarah might think she was expendable (by giving Hagar to Abraham), but God knew Sarah was vital for his plan of redemption.

Rebekah’s steps of faith and trust in God reflects Abraham’s faith and trust. She too leaves her country and goes to a land she does not know. Unlike Abraham, she leaves her family behind (whereas Abraham brings his), and makes the long journey to Canaan to be Isaac’s wife. When her hard and difficult pregnancy makes her wish she were dead, she goes to God directly to find out what is going on. What is happening to her? What does this mean? God answers her, and tells her she is bearing twins, two nations divided, and that the older brother would serve the younger. When the time came for Isaac to give his blessing, Rebekah was reading to make sure God’s will was done. For the first time I heard that what Rebekah did was right. She knew of God’s oracle—she knew that Jacob should receive the blessing. She partnered with God to make sure what he planned would happen, and she furthered the covenant promises. In doing so she became the mother Israel. No sin–only tenacious obedience to what she knew to be the will of God. I also want to look at Rachel and Leah differently too. They are matriarchs as well. Hopefully I will have much more to say about Sarah and Rebekah and about Rachel and Leah as well. I would also like to look at Hagar as a matriarch in her own right. She too had a son of promise, and God honored his covenant and commitment to her, even if Abraham and Sarah didn’t. I have just started reading about them and seeing them with new eyes. I am hoping for new revelations and new insights in the coming days.

Today seems like a good day for a poem. I hope you enjoy it.

“I want these things written on my body. We are the real countries.” —Katherine Clifford, The English Patient.

“I Want These Things Written on My Body”

Rolling curves, peaks and hills
Valleys, dips, rivers and seas
We are the real countries.
Curve of abdomen, peak of breast
Dip of waist, seas pooled in eyes
I am a country.
I want these things written on my body:
My love, my passion
That must protect those beloved.
My fear, my anger
Slow erosions of my soul.
Legend and myth well up from within
Artesian springs from imagination.
Life giving power pulsing deep within
A cave of great mystery—the womb.
I want these things written on my body:
That I loved and laughed,
But I also mourned and wept.
My anger led me to hate,
But grace led me to forgive.
That I longed for one to share my life with,
But I found contentment in solitude.
That although my womb would never conceive,
I brought forth and protected life.
Wave of hair, paths of the mind
Plain of the back, roll of the hip
I am a country.
Plains, plateaus and waterfalls
Rocky ledges, cliffs and springs
We are the real countries.

© 2005 Shawna Renee Bound

Jesus Camp, a documentary film by directors Heidi Ewing and Rachael Grady opened nationwide on September 22. The film follows children through Becky Fisher’s “Kids on Fire Summer Camp” in North Dakota. According to the trailer, the camp is designed to make the children into an army of God in order to take back America for God. Included in this training the kids are taught: “There are two kinds of people in this world: people who love Jesus and people who don’t.” They are told, “This means war! This means war! Are you a part of it or not?” They pray for President Bush by laying hands on a life-size cardboard figure of him. A young boy affirms, “We are being trained to be God’s army.” Holy war dominates the theology of this camp. One of the most disturbing things Becky Fisher says in the trailer is this:

Where should we be putting in our efforts? Where should we be putting our focus? I’ll tell you where our enemies are putting it, they’re putting it on the kids. They’re going into the schools. You go into Palestine, and I can take you to some websites that will absolutely shake you to your foundations and show you photographs of where they’re taking their kids to camps like we take our kids to Bible camps, and they’re putting hand grenades in their hands, they’re teaching them how to put on bomb belts, they’re teaching them how to use rifles, they’re teaching how to use machine guns; it’s no wonder, with that kind of intense training that [garbled], that those young people are ready to kill themselves for the cause of Islam.

I want to see young people who are as committed to the cause of Jesus Christ as the young people are to the cause of Islam. I want to see them as radically laying down their lives for the gospel as, as they are, uh, over in, in Pakistan, in, in Israel, and, and Palestine, and all those different places. You know, because we have… excuse me, but we have the truth!

I’ve recently finished reading Brian McLaren’s The Secret Message of Jesus. In chapter four he writes:

Jesus says again and again, this kingdom advances with neither violence nor bloodshed, with neither hatred nor revenge. It is not just another one of the kingdoms of this world. No, this kingdom advances slowly, quietly, under the surface—like yeast in dough, like seed in soil. It advances with faith: when people believe it is true, it becomes true. And it advances with reconciling, forgiving love: when people love strangers and enemies, the kingdom gains ground (p. 32).

Jesus also said that he came to gather sheep from many flocks (John 10:16). Unlike the Jews of his time, Jesus did not see those who belonged to Yahweh and those who did not. He believed God’s grace and love was for everyone: the poor, prostitutes, tax collectors, Samaritans, and Gentiles. He also commanded his followers to love their enemies, pray for them, and to turn the other cheek. In the face of violence he commanded us to love and to show our enemies a different way to live. Paul also counseled the Roman believers to not return evil for evil and to live in peace.

As we have seen since September 11, 2001, violence is not the answer. Violence only begets more violence and hatred. Jesus commands his followers to respond by submitting to the violence and loving in the midst of it. We are a part of the kingdom of God, which means we are called to act and live differently than the kingdoms of this world. Instead of training our children to be soldiers, we should be training them to be peacemakers. We should be telling them that Jesus loves everyone—not just those who love him back, and that Jesus wants us to show love and forgiveness, and be reconciled to our enemies—not fight with them and constantly be at war (even spiritual war) with them. Jesus did not treat outsiders or his enemies this way, and neither should we.

I heard something lately that I have never thought of before. If you’re in church long enough, you inevitably hear someone say, “Why doesn’t God start over?” He did, and it didn’t work.

God started over with Noah. After Adam and Eve disobeyed God, and they were cast out of the garden of Eden, things went downhill from there. Cain killed Abel, Lamech killed men for hurting him. Humanity quickly spiraled out of control in disobedience, arrogance, and wickedness. Humanity’s drive to be like God had driven it to so much sinful disobedience that God was disappointed that he even created humankind. But Noah was blameless and righteous. He was in a right relationship with God. He obeyed and was humble. Noah was the new Adam. God started over with the flood. He saved Noah and his family and wiped out the rest of humanity. Creation was indespensable because of our sin. God started over with a fresh slate, with a blameless and righteous man.

Then Noah planted a vineyard and made wine. Then he became the first person to get drunk. Canaan saw him passed out naked and did nothing. Shem and Jephteth covered him. Noah cursed Canaan. Then Babel. The descendents of Noah want to make a name for themselves. The arrogance was back. Once again humanity was determined to be like God. God gave them different languages. Starting over did not work.

Babel shows that starting over is not enough. The problem was deeper than that. Something more drastic needed to be done. Sin had become too persistent and insidious—it had to be dealt with another way. At the end of Genesis 11 God is not satisfied with the redemption of humanity. He is once again disappointed. God’s answer will be to call Abraham and his descendents Israel, and through them, he will reverse the curse of Genesis 3—11. When that didn’t work, God would take the most drastic action available: he would become one of us. In the death and resurrection of Christ, the curse of Genesis is finally reversed.

There are mantras that echo through the church: “Why doesn’t God start over?” “Why can’t he just take us to heaven and get it done and over with?” Because God has never given up on us. He has started over, and it didn’t work. Throughout the sin, arrogance, and disobedience, God comes to us again and again. He came to Adam and Eve. Cain. The people at Babel. He has always worked to reverse the curse that humanity brought on itself.

So what does that say about the church? What should we be doing? We definitely should drop the mantras that are so ungodlike. May be it’s time for us to act like God instead of wanting to be God.

This last weekend my husband and I saw One Night with the King, the new movie about Esther. It is a great movie, and I loved the way they protrayed Esther as a strong, intelligent, and brave woman that I always pictured her being. John Rhys-Davies is incredible as Mordecai. Until I get a review written up, I thought I would post a sermon that I preached a couple of years ago on Esther: “God Uses Harem Girls.”

“Who knows? Perhaps you have come to royal dignity for just such a time as this” (Esther 4:14). These classic words are from the book of Esther, and they come in the middle of a book of coincidences. Esther has always presented the problem that God is never mentioned; in fact, for that reason, Martin Luther did not want it included in the canon of Scripture. This is what Luther had to say about Esther: “I am so great an enemy to the second book of the Maccabees, and to Esther, that I wish they had not come to us at all, for they have too many heathen unnaturalities.” The whole book could be taken as nothing more than chance and luck. A literary tale of how a young Jewish orphan just happen to become queen and be in the right place at the right time to save her people. Or is there more to it than that?

The book begins on a whim of a king. King Ahasuerus had given a great banquet for all the leading officials and dignitaries of his kingdom. After much revelry, the king ordered for his queen, Vashti, to be brought before everyone, so he could show her off. Vashti refused. In a fit of drunken rage, Ahasuerus, for all intents and purposes divorced her to set an example that wives are to obey their husbands. After he sobered up and cooled down, he realized that he had no queen. The decree could not be changed so the search began for a new queen. All the beautiful young virgins in the provinces were brought into the harem, so that the next queen could be found. One of the virgins was Esther, a Jewish orphan who was being raised by her cousin Mordecai.

Esther was probably a teenager, no older than 16. She might have already been betrothed to a friend of the family. Ripped out of the only life she knew by the whim of an impulsive king, Esther began the one year of preparation for her one night with the king. She found favor with the Hegai, the eunuch who was in charge of the harem. But she was one of hundreds—one harem girl in the middle of harem that likely numbered in the 1000s. She would probably spend one night with the king then be sent to the house of the concubines where she would live out the rest of her life alone and with no purpose, unless the king called her again. When her night came Esther went to the king. And in the first coincidence of the book she found favor with Ahasuerus who made her queen.

Shortly after this coincidence number two happened: Mordecai found out about an assassination plot and warned Esther who told the king. The eunuchs planning the assassination were killed, and the incident was recorded. Later Haman rose to power and became the prime minister of the empire. He was second to the king. All of the king’s servants except Mordecai would bow when Haman entered the court. Infuriated that Mordecai would not worship him, Haman began a plot to kill, not only Mordecai, but his whole race, the Jews. Casting pur, or dice, to choose the day he would carry out his murderous plot, Haman received permission from the king to destroy the people whom he said would not obey the king and were trying to overthrow his authority.

The decree was sent to all the provinces and the Jews immediately began to mourn. Mordecai mourned in front of the king’s gate in sackcloth and ashes. Esther heard of it and sent clothes to him which he refused. She then asked what was wrong. He told her of the decree and urged her to go to the king and intercede for her people. Her first response was one of fear. Anyone who goes to the king without being called can be killed, and the king had not sent for her for thirty days. Because we are so well acquainted with the story, we just assume Esther is exaggerating, after all the king does accept her. But Esther really didn’t know that. This was the king who got rid of his first queen on a whim. This was the king who commanded the engineers of a bridge he was building be thrown off the end of the bridge when they fell behind due to a horrible storm. When a father requested this king not to send his last son off to war (he had lost his 3 other sons to this king’s war), the king commanded the last son be killed in front of the father, then had the father blinded so that was the last thing he saw. This was the king Esther was going to, without an invitation.

But Mordecai reminded her that her position as queen would not protect her from the edict, and if she chose not to act, deliverance for the Jews would arise from elsewhere. Then the prod: “Who knows? May be that is why you are here.” Who knows? May be this is why you are married to a pagan Gentile? May be this why all of these coincidences happened? Esther agreed and asked Mordecai to have the Jews of Susa fast for her, and she and her maids would also fast for three days, then she would go to the king–even if it cost her her life. She would do the right thing—she would appeal for the life of her people.

Ahasuerus had deposed the queen who did not come when she was summoned. What would he do with a queen who came when she had not been summoned? Once again Esther found favor with the king and requested that he and Haman attend a banquet which led into an invitation to a banquet the next day. But on his way home Haman saw Mordecai, and once again he was filled with rage at this Jew who would not worship him. Complaining of it at home, his family and friends suggested he build gallows and request Mordecai be hung on it the next day.

Now another coincidence happens: the king had insomnia. He commanded the book of the annals be brought to him and heard the re-telling of how Mordecai saved his life. After finding out that Mordecai had not been rewarded, Ahasuerus decided to reward him. Coincidently, at that moment, Haman entered the court. The king had him brought in and asked him what is to be done with the man the king wishes to honor. Thinking that the king could not possibly want to honor anyone but himself, Haman devises this elaborate show of putting the king’s clothes on the man, sitting him on a horse the king has ridden, setting a crown on his head, and walking through the streets proclaiming that this is what happens for the man whom the king wishes to honor. Ahasuerus loved the idea and ordered Haman to do this for Mordecai. Although Ahasuerus does not know it, he just saved the life of the man who saved his life earlier in the story. Haman did as he was commanded then ran home humiliated. While he was telling his family what had happened, the servants of the king come to escort him to Esther’s second banquet.

At this banquet Esther presented her case to the king. She pled for the life of her people whom Haman would have executed. On finding out Haman’s plot, the king left the room, and when he returned he found Haman on the queen’s couch pleading for his life. Ahasuerus accuses Haman of assaulting the queen, and in a wonderful twist of irony, Haman is taken away to be hung on the gallows he had built for Mordecai. Esther once again intercedes for her people, and a decree is issued that on the day of the intended massacre, the Jews can defend themselves and kill their enemies. But something happened before this day of defense. For the very first time my attention was drawn to the last part of the last verse in Esther 8. Esther 8:17 simply says, “And many among the peoples of the land became Jews, for the dread of the Jews had fallen on them” (NASB). Other people came into the people of God because of Esther’s decision to act to save her people at the cost of her own life. I am reminded of all the passages in Isaiah, Jeremiah, and Ezekiel where God tells the people one of the reasons He is sending them into exile for their sins is so that the nations will know that He is God. One of the results of all of these coincidences piling up is that “many among the peoples of the land”—the people of the nations, is that they see that the God of the Jews is God, and they respond by becoming part of the people of God. The festival that followed this day came to be known as Purim, and Esther is read every year during this feast. And once again we are reminded that this isn’t just for the ethnic Jews. In Esther 9:27 we read, “the Jews established and accepted as a custom for themselves and their descendants and all who joined them, that without fail they would continue to observe these two days every year, as it was written and at the time appointed.”

The thing that stands out most about Esther is the fact God is never mentioned. In fact any mention of God or religion is obviously missing from this book. If Esther is read historically and literally God can be left out all together. It is truly a book of coincidences. That is why we need Esther. To often we think that just because there is no obvious working of God in the world that God is not working. Esther’s discreet witness says otherwise.

And we need these reminders. We need reminders that God working in our world is not always obvious—even to those in the church. We also need reminders that God uses harem girls to accomplish His purposes. Sometimes God uses the small things, the little things, the things that could be easily overlooked to accomplish His purposes. Paul reflects this truth in some of my favorite verses in the Bible, 1 Corinthians 1:25-29: “For God’s foolishness is wiser than human wisdom, and God’s weakness is stronger than human strength. Consider your own call, brothers and sisters: not many of you were wise by human standards, not many were powerful, not many were of noble birth. But God chose what is foolish in the world to shame the wise; God chose what is weak in the world to shame the strong; God chose what is low and despised in the world, things that are not, to reduce to nothing things that are, so that no one might boast in the presence of God.”

There are always those times in life when we wonder where God is. Esther reminds us that there are times that God is firmly behind the scenes, and we may not see how He has been working till well after what is taking place now. Part of our walk with God is realizing that God is with us regardless of circumstances or how we feel. The Jews had to have felt abandoned as they saw the decree that would take all of their lives. But seven years before they even realized they were going to need a deliverer, God had made sure a Jewish queen was in the palace. Even in the worst the world can throw at us, God continues to walk with us and provide ways of deliverance for His people. He walks with us through the messes as well as the celebrations.

The book of Esther seems to be driven by whims, accidents, and coincidence. But is it? The underlying, almost invisible, current running through Esther is that God is working His purposes out for the world—He can even use a harem girl and an arrogant, pagan king to do this. The book of coincidences is really a book of grace. In one of the most pagan places possible—the palace of a pagan king who does not even know that he has married a Jew, nor does he know that a decree has went out in his name to destroy his wife and her people, God is working.

One thing which Israel and later the Jews excelled at was their ability to see God at work in their world and in their history. There was no such thing as chance or coincidence. That is why Esther is in the canon. Although there is no explicit mention of God, the implication is that God is working behind the scenes, and He continues to do so right here and right now. I think this is the reason a Jewish philosopher disagreed with Martin Luther. Moses Maimonides said, “When Messiah comes, the other books [of the Bible] may pass away, but the Torah and Esther will abide forever.” In the Torah—the first five books of the Bible—God comes on Sinai with lightning and thunder, and everyone knows He is there. But Esther reminds us that’s not the only way God comes—sometimes He comes and stays quietly behind the scenes working through harem girls.

Abraham had two children with two different women. Isaac and Rachel had two children. Jacob has at least 13 children, with 7 being with Leah. What does the “typical biblical family” look like? It’s hard to tell by the patriarchs. Abraham had a wife and a concubine. Isaac and Rachel were monogamous regardless of the number of children they could produce. Then there’s Jacob with two wives and two concubines and a brood of kids. I think it’s safe to say that there is no one “typical” family model in the Bible no matter how much some conservative Evangelicals want there to be. The New Testament is even foggier with Jesus changing the rules about family. In fact he redefined family saying “Whoever obeys my Father’s word, this is my mother, brothers, and sisters.” He also didn’t go into the putting family above all else mentality that we see in conservative evangelicalism. He said no one could put their family above him and still call themselves a disciple of Christ. This redefinition of family continues through the New Testament as the Church, the body of Christ, becomes family. Paul mentions several family members “in the Lord,” but he doesn’t mention one biological family member in his writing. We only know that Paul had a sister and nephew thanks to Luke. We know Priscilla and Aquila were married, but we have no idea if they had kids: Paul and Luke never say. Then there’s Paul and Jesus—neither of them even bothered to marry. It also appears that Barnabas, Lydia, and Timothy were all single as well. And yet they are part of the body of Christ—part of the family of God.

Of course when we see family in the biblical and Middle Eastern sense of the word, it is not the nuclear family we are used to. Family was the extended family, which usually lived together—may be not in one dwelling, but all of their houses or tents were right next to each other. When a son married, the parents built a room on top of their house for the couple. The couple then moved in. The family was run by the oldest living male—the patriarch, and everyone—parents, aunts, uncles, cousins, children lived together. This was family in the Old Testament and New Testament. In Acts we also see the concept of household, which includes all the relatives plus the servants and slaves. Just how many people were added to the body of Christ when Cornelius and his whole household repented and were baptized? His wife (or wives), children, relatives, servants and slaves? Lydia’s household also were baptized. Who all did that include? Lydia’s relatives? An aged mother or grandmother, siblings, nieces or nephews? Then there were her servants and slaves, all of which repented and were baptized and became the first church in Europe. Households and families were very different than the Western nuclear family. In fact, in many parts of the world, this is the way family and households look like today. Not even Christians in other countries will agree with the American Evangelical definition of “family.”

There is a reason I’m bringing all of this up. I have seen a couple of articles about larger families starting to be more common than the typical 2-3 child norm our society worships. Of course these larger families are looked down upon, especially the mothers who decided that this is what they wanted: to have a large family. On the other end of the spectrum are couples like my husband and I. I cannot have children, and we’ve decided not to adopt. And both of these decisions should be fine with the church along with those who have chosen to remain single. All of these families are represented in the Bible. My husband and I should not be classified as “selfish” because we’ve chosen not to have the culturally accepted family. Neither should women like Leslie Leland Fields, who wrote, The Case for Kids at Christianity Today, be judged on why she and her husband have six children. Leslie mainly talked about the reaction outside of the church on her big family, but I can see raised eyebrows in the church foyer when they walk by as well. It is more acceptable in the church for a larger family because we see children as a blessing from God. But I still have heard comments about “what were they thinking” directed at couples with a lot of children.

Back to my end of the spectrum: please do not believe that because I don’t have children that means I hate them or don’t want to be around them. I love children. And every child needs at least one adult in their life who shares their life and hangs out with them because they want to and not because they have to. I love being that person. I love being Aunt Shawna. When I told this to one of my best friends, Virginia, she absolutely agreed. That meant a lot to me because Virginia is a mother (she has two kids), and she is called to children’s ministry: she’s a children’s pastor. I take very seriously the part of the infant dedication or infant baptism where the pastor turns to the congregation and asks the congregation to do all they can to help the parents raise their children in Christ and in the Church. When I say, “I will,” I mean it. I will do anything I can to help parents raise their children to know the love and grace of Jesus. Whether they have two, six, or ten, no set of parents can raise children by themselves: they need the church; they need a community. This was something the extended family provided in the Bible: parents weren’t all on their own raising a family. This is also the way neighborhoods used to be: the entire street helped parents raise their kids. It wasn’t a Lone Ranger thing.

In her book Real Sex, Lauren Winner points out that both singleness and married life teach the church about God and his kingdom. Marriage teaches us about God’s love for us, the church. Marriage teaches us what faithfulness in a relationship looks like. It also teaches us about forgiveness and compromise. Just as marriage is not easy, it is not always easy to be part of the community, and it’s not always easy to be in a relationship with God. Singleness teaches the church utter dependence on God. Singles don’t have a partner always there to help. They have to depend on God for their intimacy. They teach us that there should always be an empty spot in our lives for God alone. They also remind us that in the end the only marriage is between Christ and his Church, and all of us will be siblings. Our primary relationship with each other is not as spouses, but as brothers and sisters in Christ. Before our marriage vows are our baptismal vows. Before we married, we were a sister or brother to our spouse.

Let’s take this a step further for families of all kinds. Large families teach us we don’t always get what we want in community. Siblings may have to share bedrooms and toys. They can’t hog the bathroom or the computer. They also have to conserve: their clothes will go to the next sibling. They have to learn to share. They also have to learn to compromise. They know life isn’t all about them when there are younger siblings too play with and care for. Childless families remind us that we don’t always get what we want. Not all of us are called to be parents, just like not all are called to be parents to a large family. Childless families remind the church that family is a much larger concept than those who live under our roofs. We also remind the families with children that they don’t have to go it alone. We are here to help. We spend time with their kids because we want to. We also remind the church that marriage is not for children alone: we can use our marriages to build the kingdom of God. Childless couples have more time and resources for short-term mission trips, giving to those in need, and in helping the families at church to raise their children in a godly way. All of us together show the world what the kingdom God is like. It’s like the single person who depends on God for the intimacy she or he craves when they crawl into their bed alone every night. It’s like the married couple who does not let the sun go down on their anger and work through their argument to reconciling peace before they go to the bed. It’s like the family with two children who show us how important it is to know our limits and to do what is best for the entire family. It is like the family who has six children and teaches that us life does not revolve around us: we have to share, we don’t always have to space we want, and there are others who need us. All of this is what it looks like to be part of the church, part of the family of God.

NOTE: This is an idea I have for an article. It’s basically a paragraph outline. Ideas? Comments? Suggestions?