Shawna R. B. Atteberry

Hipchickmamma goes to seminary had this wonderful poem posted on her blog today, and I decided to copy her. It’s too go good not to share.

I saw Jesus yesterday,
she winked at me and said I looked really cute.

When I blushed
she said for me to smile more
it brings her light to my face.

Later I saw a homeless man,
I waved hello
and when he smiled
he winked at me,
his eyes glimmered too.

I found myself blushing,
not sure what to say or do.

I think I saw Jesus today
but mamma said I
must be crazy
“‘cuz Jesus don’t wear no dirty suit.”

Sister says Jesus only wear white.
When I mentioned daddy’s
pimpin’ white shoes
mamma slapped me
said not to make light.

I won’t tell her
I saw Jesus yesterday,
and Jesus was a girl
dressed in blue,
with pretty brown eyes
and scraggly brown hair
crying as she held her baby tight.

She looked so sad,
until I stopped to say hi.

Have you seen Jesus today? This week?

I’m sure you’ve noticed the silence of my blog. I have depression, and a couple of weeks ago it swung into action. I think the trigger was preparing the presentation for the University of Phoenix and the assessment and interview (and how I worried the whole thing to death). The last two weeks have been filled with insomnia, headaches, dizziness, fatigue, worry, and anxiety. I found a great psychatrist here, and in addition to Paxil, which I already take, I am now on a small dose of Clonazepam as well. I’ve been on the Clonazepam for a few days, and I already feel better. I am sleeping (thank goodness), and my anxiety levels are way down. I am no longer worrying about every little thing. Honestly this last week it was hard for me to do just day-to-day things like getting out of bed and eating, much less writing.

It has also helped that the weather is springlike, and I can get outside and walk down to the lake (I’m enjoying it while it lasts: it’s supposed to snow this weekend). It’s absolutely beautiful. I took pictures, but I can’t find the cord to download them onto the computer. I am feeling back to normal with regular times of prayer, meditation, and exercise. I am also amping up the journaling so I can keep track of my moods and patterns. One thing depression teaches you is that you have to take care of yourself.

Writing a series on my experiences in depression is on the list of the subjects I want to write on, so you will probably start seeing posts on depression, how I’ve managed it, and what I’ve learned from it.

I am holy ground.
My body is holy ground.
All around me they scream: “Unholy!”
The world cries: “Unholy!”
The church sniffs derisively “Unholy!”
Unholy by virtue of my sex.
Unholy because of my body.
My body can’t be what it is—
mature,
full,
curvy,
feminine.
No–my body is never too age.
I am to be a perennial adolescent—
never to grow;
never to age.
My body is not to be spoken of:
it’s cycles,
it’s fertility,
it’s sexuality (what girls have that?),
it’s sensuality.
It’s power.
The “M” words are never spoken.
I am forced to hold my mysteries deep in myself.
My body cannot be seen:
it must be covered.
It’s temptation in a skirt.
It’s a sin waiting to happen.
But my body can be exploited:
TO SELL!
TO SELL!
TO SELL!
Isn’t this prostitution?
So what does it mean that I am holy ground?
What does it mean the my body is holy ground?
What does it mean for me—
A Woman—
to be holy ground?

©2007 Shawna R. B. Atteberry

Readings: Genesis 15:1-12, 17-18; Psalm 27; Philippians 3:12—4:1; Luke 13:31-35

God of our fathers and mothers,
Your faithfulness knows no bounds.
Your love is beyond measure.
So many times we stumble and fall.
So many times we lack faith.
Forgive us and strengthen us.
Help us to grow in Christlikeness and stand firm in Your love.
Amen.

During Lent here at Suburban Presbyterian Church, we are exploring the creative and liturgical arts, with classes and speakers dealing with storytelling, iconography, dance, visual art, writing, and so on. The theme is “A Beautiful Thing,” inspired by the story of the woman anointing Jesus and his declaration that “She has done a beautiful thing for me.” (Mark 14, NIV)

We are working on the notion that everything we do can be considered a beautiful thing–a creative offering to God–whether it’s gardening or scrapbooking or accounting or sorting clothes at the clothes closet or child-rearing. And so:

1. Would you call yourself “creative”? Why or why not?

Yes, there are a lot of things I do that are creative.

2. Share a creative or artistic pursuit you currently do that you’d like to develop further.

Writing and crocheting (see skirt in pic).

3. Share a creative or artistic pursuit you have never done but would like to try.

Calligraphy! I have all the things I need; I just need to get started.

4. Complete this sentence: “I am in awe of people who can _____________.”

Sing. I can’t, so it’s one of those great mysteries to me—especially people who can sing by ear.

5. Share about a person who has encouraged your creativity, who has “called you to your best self.” (I’m pretty sure that’s from the Gospel of Oprah.)

Most definitely Jenn. We’re both writers, and it seems she’s finding ways of egging me on to be the best writer I can be.

I have added a Women in Ministry category to the menu. It has several links that have wonderful articles, resources, and stories of women in ministry from the New Testament until now.

I’m sure most of you have heard about the special the Discovery Channel will have on a tomb found that could be the tomb of Jesus and his family. Ben Witherington has a series of posts on why this probably isn’t the tomb of Jesus and his family. He starts his critique of the special with this:

First of all, I have worked with Simcha [Jacobovici, one of the producers]. He is a practicing Jew, indeed he is an orthodox Jew so far as I can tell. He was the producer of the Discovery Channel special on the James ossuary which I was involved with. He is a good film maker, and he knows a good sensational story when he sees one. This is such a story. Unfortunately it is a story full of holes, conjectures, and problems. It will make good TV and involves a bad critical reading of history. Basically this is old news with a new interpretation. We have known about this tomb since it was discovered in 1980. There are all sorts of reasons to see this as much ado about nothing much.

Ben goes on to list those reasons in The Jesus Tomb? “Titanic” Talpoit Tomb Theory Sunk from the Start.

He has also posted two other posts as more evidence has come to him: Problems Multiply for Jesus Tomb Theory and The Smoking Gun—Tenth Talpoit Ossuary Proved to Be Blank.

The picture is from The Discovery Channel.