Shawna R. B. Atteberry

Over the last couple of months I have realized how negative my self-talk is. If someone else said the things to me I was saying to me, I would have decked him or her. Or at least walked away. But for months I let my personal demons and critics beat me up over and over again. No wonder I never felt good and always thought I was skic. I was running myself into the ground and wearing myself out.

All I did was tell myself I couldn’t do whatever it was I waas working on. The book proposal was never going to be finished, let alone a book written and published. My sermons sucked: all of them. Who did I think I was to plant a church? Regularly posting to my blog and drawing attention to it? A pipe dream. It was no wonder I was depressed, had no energy, and thought I might have chronic fatigue syndrom.

I am slowly changing how I talk to myself. For the last couple of months, I’ve started to pay attention to what bounces aroun in my head. It wasn’t good. I am slowly stopping the negative thoughts in their tracks and replacing all of that negative chatter with postive affirmations:

• I am a good writer.
• I’ve already written a book: my graduate thesis. (For those who don’t know the book proposal I am working on is rewriting my thesis for the general public. That is how Career Women of the Bible was born.)
• I can write another book. And another book. And another….
• I am a good pastor.
• I am a good preacher.
• If my sermons sucked, my PK Hubby would have said something.

When I’m working on Career Women of the Bible and I think, “This will never happen, I cut off the critic. Then I say (if I’m alone out loud): “I am a good writer, and I am going to finish this book proposal.” I’ve also set up a little group to be accountable to daily, so I do write instead of psyching myself out.

Self-talk is very important. How we talk to ourselves makes all the difference. If we don’t believe we’ll succed, then we don’t try very hard, if at all. At one point, I’m not sure I could have seen that due to the depression. But now that is under control with antidepressants, I am able to stop, look at what I’m saying to myself, and say, “No. That’s not right. That is not who I am. This is who I am.”

What have you been saying to yourself? Is it good? Positive? Or are you running yourself into the ground? How do you deal with negative self talk? What do you say to build yourself up and live into your potential?

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